Got some Dramamine?

Last fall my cousin convinced me to join him for a poker cruise to Central America.

We'd been playing Texas Hold'em for awhile and I thought I was getting pretty good at it. This would be my opportunity to play against others from around the country and show them just how good I was. Or so I thought.

We flew DC to Houston and then bussed to Galveston to board the boat, a Carnival cruise ship. After instructions and a snack, we sat down for our first Texas Hold'em game. I decided to start at a low denomination table, while my cousin went immediately to play with the big guns upstairs.

At some point during the game (at which I was doing fairly well) the seas got a little rough and so did my stomach. I decided to tough it out and kept on playing. The table was a mixed bag of players, young and old, experienced and not so experienced. I figured the 70ish grandmother type at the other end of the table to be the weakest link. I was wrong.

The dealer deals me a pair of tens. I call the bet when it's my turn, deciding to play it cool.

The flop is a pair of sevens and a ten. Full house, tens over sevens. I call and raise. Everyone folds except for grandma, who calls my bet.

The turn is a two, no help. Grandma bets, I call and raise, she calls my raise. Huh? I'm convinced I have the nuts so I raise again. She calls me.

The river is a five. I'm now convinced I'm unbeatable. She checks, I bet. She raises. I raise her back. She calls. I turn over my cards and announce, proudly, Full House. She turns over her pocket sevens and announces, more proudly, four of a kind.